The miracle that never was

I was driving along the Pacific Coast Highway on the morning lap of my daily commute and was listening to the classical music program broadcast from the University of South California and I was thinking to myself “This is great, this is what we like to hear on a classical music station: something different. What is this ? A piece by Béla Bartok unknown to me? Or is it perhaps a later twentieth century composition? That beat, like with the Ghanaian tom-tom from my adventurous days; the beat that Trance music (130 to 160 beats per minute) has put to an equally good use?”
So I was there with my enthusiasm rising crescendo, keenly awaiting the verdict, praising the blessed radio station for being so boldly innovative. And then the speaker’s voice disannounced: “We just heard five of Mozart’s ‘German dances’.” Rats! He had done it again. Wolfgang Amadeus, you dirty scoundrel!